How To Shape Your Environment To Help You Deal With Your Break Up   by Ruben

in Relationships / Dating    (submitted 2011-03-14)

In the and this article I am going to explain how to get your ex back.

One of the most counter-intuitive principles when it comes to re-attracting an ex-lover is the fact that a bit of space from the relationship is required for the both of you to eventually fall back in love.

The reason I say this is because right now you are not the version of yourself that your ex initially fell for. When the two of you first met and subsequently began to date, your ex was drawn to the happy, rational, amazing version of yourself at the time. Right now you've turned into someone different. In the aftermath of a breakout, people usually are emotional wrecks, irrational, lonely and depressed. Essentially, the person you've turned into after an emotionally painful breakup is much different from the person your ex initially met.

That's why it's important to take some time for yourself and get yourself back on her feet. In fact, for a short bit of time your ex should be the last person on your mind. In order to fully heal, you can't be in contact with your old flame for at least two months. This is going give you ample time to clear your mind and get yourself together.

During this time you want to be proactive in the healing process. One of the best ways to do this is to make sure that your mind is clear of your ex. Although this sounds great in theory, in practice it's much more difficult to pull off. Let's face it, you've been with this person for a long period of time, seeing and talking to them every single day. It's extremely difficult to just flip a switch on and remove them from your mind. Therefore, you should set up your environment in a way that will make it inevitable for you to accomplish this.

You can do this in a few ways. For one, you can make a game with all of your friends and family to help you with this. If you say your ex's name, you have to pay them one dollar. This will force you not to speak and more importantly, not to think about your ex (especially when you're with your friends and family).

Also, you can make a pact with yourself to give yourself some sort of a punishment if you check your ex's Facebook profile or try calling or texting them. Maybe you'll have to give five dollars to charity every single time you do one of these things. Not only will you help clear your mind from your ex, you might be able to help a worthwhile organization in the process.

Finally, you could temporarily erase your ex from your mind by removing all reminders of your ex in your home. Get a box, and store all pictures, CDs, books, clothes, letters and notes, and everything and anything that was directly attached to your relationship and ex. Tape the box up and put it in an attic or in a closet or anywhere else that is out of plain sight. You'll be surprised how clear your mind will be when there are no visual reminders of your relationship throughout your home.

About the Author

Although these are a few tips on getting your ex out of your mind and getting yourself back on your feet, what’s the next step once this is done? To learn this and find out how to get your ex back be sure to check out Breakup Hub. This is a site designed for guys trying to learn how to get your ex girlfriend back or girls trying to learn to do the same.